Engaging Times

I got a text message from my sister's boyfriend asking to meet up for lunch. It was the first time he'd talked to me without my sister around so I checked with my sister to find out if anything was up.

Turned out that they'd been talking about marriage after 6 months of dating and he wanted to ask my Dad for permission. Given that Dad was in a nursing home and Grandad was a little bit scarier, my sister directed him to ask me as the 'responsible male' in our family to confront.

I called Mum that morning to talk to her. She had never met him, but trusted my judgement. Talk about pressure! I'd met him a few times and he seemed to check out. He seemed to genuinely care for my sister and was a guy who other guys looked up to and respected. He knew how to cook a BBQ and made mean Tacos/Burritos/Enchiladas (being Mexican and all) I'd seen my sister grow up a bit since dating him and knew he would look after her.

So after praying about it, I arrived early at the cafe to have a man-to man chat. I never envisaged I'd have to have this kind of conversation for many years to come. I began to think how terrifying it must be to ask and tired ot think of how to make things as easy as possible for the nervous guy.

He arrvied on time (always a good sign for a protective brother) and we went insdie and tucked into some food. There was the necessary small talk. I asked him about his college studies and he asked me about my work. I gently offered him a way in. "So how's things going with my sister?"

The relief washed across his face as he realised he could get to the point. He cleared his throat and began his spiel. He described their relationship and how much he loved my sister. Hearing the warmth and affection in his voice I knew that this was something serious and something good. He was edging closer and closer to the question. The poor guy... I could palpate the tension and knew what he was about to ask, but I had to let him get to it himself...to pre-empt would strip him of his victory.

"I want to ask for your permission to ask your sister to marry me"

I paused for a second, with admiration for this brave man's dignity and then replied in affirmation. I told him of my respect for his asking and of our family's blessing.

I then sat with him and prayed for them both, for their marriage to be a blessing to each other and to all who they come into contact with. As we rose, he said to me "You know, you're the first person who's ever prayed for the both of us... thankyou..."

2 months later he sat down with us at the family Christmas dinner table and met them all. I remember that after my last sister was born I was so livid that God had denied me a brother. God is not slow in keeping his promises as some understand slowness. In 1 year's time I will have a new brother-in-law and can't wait to welcome him to our family.